Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
