He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Randomize
