woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
