I wannas sexs uuuuu
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize