We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
