i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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