I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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