just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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