she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
