Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
