I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
