he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize