I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
