rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
