I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize