i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
