...so i touched it.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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