So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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