I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
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