are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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