Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize