Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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