He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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