Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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