Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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