Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
