Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
