I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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