i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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