How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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