just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize
