so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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