Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
