Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
