it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
