new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
