I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Why are your pants in the freezer?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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