Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
