what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
she told me i tasted like america
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Randomize
