what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
