I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
