Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
