Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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