i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
