I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
