super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
