we made out on top of his cat.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
