I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize