i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
