roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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