Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
It's official drugs can't kill me
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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