party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
