Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
